Destiel and maybe other pairings Oneshots and Drabbles
by The-Sky-Is-Forever
Summary: I write a Hell of a lot of oneshots on my phone and I'm going to start uploading them to here; the only reason I'm putting them all in the same fic is that I don't want to clutter my page. I'll do requests. Please read! Will be mainly Destiel based but if I get requests for other pairings I can write those too. Rated T just in case I decide to do anything T worthy. Fluff, angst etc
1. Cas' Death

Cas coughed up a mixture of blood and saliva. He was lying on the floor, surrounded by a pool of blood that was pouring from the gaping wound in his stomach. Dean was knelt next to him, clutching his arm, crying. A collection of men were stood on all sides watching sadly. "I'm- I'm so sorry- I didn't-." One was stuttering. His blond hair was splattered with blood and some more was dripping down his front and his hands. A knife, covered in Cas' blood, was lying on the floor next to the blond man. "He just- Scared me- I didn't know it was him- He came out of nowhere- I didn't mean to!"

The man fell silent as Cas choked, more of his blood spitting out of his mouth. Dean was desperately trying to stem the flow of blood that was pouring from Cas' wound.

"Dean." Sam said quietly. He knew that there was no hope for Castiel, not now that he was human. Sam had seen people die from a lot less and they were at their physical peak. Cas wasn't strong; he was barely recovered from his fall and still didn't sleep or eat much.

"No." Dean spat as Cas convulsed on the floor. He would not, could not, accept that Cas was dying. He knew that the damage was too much. He knew that there was nothing that could be done... But he wasn't going to accept that yet.

"Dean-." Cas coughed. "Dean stop."

"No." Dean protested. "You aren't going to- I'm not going to- You aren't dying here. Not now. Not after everything. Not after what we've been through." Dean gripped Cas' hand urgently.

"Dean, it's okay." Cas whispered, low enough that only Dean could hear.

"No it's not... It's not okay. I need you, Cas." Dean replied, looking down at Cas, half-glaring at him, almost _daring _him to die.

A couple of men shifted uncomfortably. A dark-haired man stood right at the edge of the room turned away, covering his face to conceal his sadness.

"Dean." Cas said, softly, attempting a smile. "You don't need me. You never did. You could always manage by yourself. It's true Dean." He added when Dean opened his mouth to protest. "You and Sam are the real team. You are brothers after all." He smiled weakly.

"Cas you are so much more than my brother. You are my best friend, you're my family and..." Dean took a deep breath. "Cas, I love you." He whispered, his eyes blurring with tears and his face creasing in his bitter and painful grief.

Cas smiled with a sad form of happiness and gazed up at the other man, "I know, you idiot."

Dean let out a choked laugh.

Cas looked at the other man with an amused pity. "Dean, you used to pray to me. I could literally hear your thoughts." Cas chuckled. Keeping one hand on the wound he weakly lifted his right hand up and placed it on Dean's neck. He pulled Dean down until they were barely an inch apart. "I love you too." He breathed.

"You chose a Hell of a time to tell me." Dean whispered before Cas pressed his lips against Dean's, both of their tears streaming down their faces and mixing on their lips and in their kiss.

As they separated Cas began to cough violently. Tears pouring down his face, Cas looked up at Dean, his vision becoming less clear by the second. "Dean, don't be afraid." He panted, desperately. "We'll see each other again. We will. Sooner or later we will meet again." His words were getting faster and he was nodding urgently and erratically.

He paused and took a deep, shaky breath, attempting to calm himself.

He closed his eyes.

One final deep breath.

The blue eyes opened for a final time.

"Goodbye Dean."

Cas spoke his final words quietly and the ex-angel died, maybe not peacefully, but happily, in the arms of his hunter.

'Don't be afraid...We'll see each other again... We will meet again...'

* * *

Dean was shaking as he stared at his reflection in the mirror. He looked himself straight in the eye.

'Goodbye Dean.'

Dean let out a gasp of air, hands gripping the cold sink tightly, arms barely holding him there.

Dean shook his head slightly, breathing deeply, slowing his heart rate. Cas' words 'We'll see each other again' were echoing round and round in his mind. How soon could Dean see him? Would Cas be brought back to him or did he have to go to Cas?

Dean shuddered as he stood there; arms trembling.

He pulled out the blade he carried in his jacket and held it up to the light. It wouldn't take much, one little cut, one little slice. Maybe some pain but that wouldn't last. He knew how to make it quick; he had done it to others often enough.

He turned away from the mirror, his mind flickered to Sam. Was it worth it? Sam had had to bury him often enough and he didn't have Bobby or Ellen or anyone left to help him. Dean shook his head. Sam would be fine; he'd have to be. Besides, Sam had gotten through this plenty of times. He'd find someone, another Jess or Sarah or Madison or Amelia, and he would get through it.

Dean placed the tip of the knife directly over his heart, ready to plunge it in so he could be with Cas.

"You better be waiting for me." Dean said clearly. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes tightly, and stabbed the knife straight into his heart.

* * *

"Glad to see you made it." A familiar voice smiled sadly. "But you could have waited."

"Cas." Dean breathed.

He span round, dropping the silver knife. It hit the ground with a dull thud, the blood-stained tip buried deep into the soft earth, as Dean ran. Ran as fast as he could towards his fallen-angel. Towards his Heaven. Towards Cas.


	2. Chick-Flick Moments

**AN: This one is very short [some of them will be and i'm sorry about that] but I hope you enjoy it nevertheless. Please leave a review. Requests are very welcome! Much love x**

Cas paused and glanced back at Sam and Dean as he reached the door, his face was pale and his mouth twisted into a nervous grimace and yet his eyes were defiant and resolute. Dean clutched the handle of his knife, anxiously twisting it round in his hands. Cas nodded at the pair from a distance before tuning to go inside the tall dark building. He appeared to grow larger as he faced the building, bravery growing, and he took a step forwards.

Dean, in a random moment of desire and desperation, leapt to his feet and began to run, dropping his gun beside Sam as he went. Cas turned as he heard him. Dean reached Cas and threw himself at the angel. Eyes blazing with passion they collided into a wall and Dean kissed Castiel fiercely on the mouth, lips pressing together, one of Cas' hands coming up and his fingers griping Dean's hair. Dean pressed into Cas against the wall and Cas pulled Dean's hair tighter, twisting it around his fingers. They moved together, against the wall, for a moment.

Dean pulled away. "Stay safe." He whispered, taking a step back and looking at the angel worriedly.

Dean turned on his heel and quickly made his way back to Sam leaving Cas looking stunned at what he had just done.

"No chick-flick moments then?" Sam asked sarcastically, handing Dean's gun back to him.

"Shut up." Dean replied, but he was hiding a smile that was slowly creeping its way further and further onto his face.


	3. Holding You Closer

_'A drop in the ocean_

_A change in the weather_

_I was praying that you and me might end up together_

_It's like wishing for rain as I stand in the desert_

_But I'm holding you closer than most_

_Cos you are my Heaven'_

Dean and Castiel stood, arms around each other, Cas' back pressed to the wall, clinging to each other tightly. Their eyes shut with Cas' forehead resting on Dean's shoulder, they were pressed as close to the other as they could, as though they were one person. Dean was murmuring soft words into Cas' ear.

They acted as though no one else was there, as though they were alone in the world. In reality, however, the room was full. People were rushing around, finding family members and loved ones, cleaning weapons, blocking the doors and windows, preparing for the next stage of the war they were in the middle of.

For Dean and Cas, time stood still. They didn't move. They barely thought. The only thing in their mind was the other person because, right now, that was all that mattered. People had died; it didn't matter. More would die; it didn't matter. They were in a war with Hell; it didn't matter.

If their home, if their world, was to be taken from them then they would treasure every moment with each other that they could.

"Don't let go." Cas whispered.

"Never." Dean replied.


	4. Final Letters

_Dear Cas, _

_I've started writing this with no idea of what I'm going to say. It just seemed right. I'm leaving in a few minutes. I know you're against this but, Cas, it is right. I hope you find this letter. I'll leave it somewhere obvious._

_I know that you know, Cas, but I don't think I ever said it out loud, and now... Well, now I'll never get to. So if I can't say it, I will write it down. I love you, Cas. I like the way that looks written down. I love you, Cas. I love you. I love you. Anyway, in case I never come back, there it is._

_One more thing before I leave, I am so sorry. I'm so sorry I broke that promise. You know which one I mean. Sam will keep my promise. (I promise). I've left him a letter too. With yours. _

_In case you never get your mojo back, live a good life Cas. You are good as a human. Don't lose yourself. Find a wife or a husband or someone who will make you happy and start a family. Or be a hunter. Just don't give up. Be you._

_Okay. I'm going now. This is getting cheesy and I'm going to think about not going._

_And for the last time, probably ever, I love you. _

_I'll see you again, one day._

_Yours eternally, _

_Dean._

* * *

_Hey Sammy,_

_I don't know if you read Cas' letter or not but in case you didn't, I made him a promise in it. I told him you would help him get his angel-ness back. Please do that for me. I think you would anyway but I'm just making sure._

_You already know everything I could write here and I know exactly what you would say to me "Dean you're being stupid" or "You don't need to sacrifice yourself". I do though Sam and I hope you'll forgive me. Knowing you, you won't. _

_You and Cas will be up soon so it's time for me to go. _

_Bye Sam, I'll miss you brother._

_Dean._

_P.S. Don't blame yourself for this._

* * *

_Dean_,

_Like you did, I have begun my letter with nothing to say. It felt right to write back to you, even if you will never read it. I loved you too. I LOVED YOU TOO. _

_You didn't need to do this, Dean, you really didn't. We could have worked this out._

_Oh, Dean. I'm so sorry. My words cannot tell, not even in part, of the debt that is owed by me. I gave everything for you Dean. Everything. But I never once imagined that you would do the same for me. How could I know? How could I possibly understand when you kept yourself so… locked away. _

_I know of only one way I can see you… But I'm afraid, Dean. I'm so afraid. I love you. I guess it's because I love you that it is the only way. It seems… almost ironic that it would end this way… after you gave me life, taught me how to live. I love you, I love you, I love you. _

_I'll see you soon. _

_Yours, forever and always,_

_Cas._

* * *

_Sam,_

_This wasn't your fault and I'm sorry._

_Goodbye._

_Faithfully,_

_Castiel. _


	5. How Can I Sleep Without You?

Cas lay staring up at the ceiling, human and tired, but unable to sleep. The motel he was staying in was remarkably similar to all the ones he had shared with Dean and Sam. The only difference? He was alone. Cas blinked his blue eyes. Tired but unable to sleep. Lonely but without company. He only wanted Dean and Dean's ability to sooth him. Cas closed his eyes, willing himself to drop off. To fall into the unknown world of dreams, where, if he wished it, he could be with Dean.

He hadn't seen either Winchester brother since the night of The Fall of Angels. The world was in chaos. How do you explain to a world of humans that those strange lights, those strange falling people, are- were Angels of the Lord? And if they can't understand that then what do you tell them?

Cas' mind began to drift through all the terrible events of the last year and when he did fall asleep, it was a world of nightmares and horror he fell into.

He woke violently and, in a moment of panic, threw off the covers and stumbled out of the bed. His nylon shirt was clinging to him, soaked with sweat. He pressed his back against the cool wall, breathing heavily. Shutting his eyes he took a deep breath and attempted to calm himself down. Lights flickered behind his eyelids; the sight of his brothers and sisters falling from their home was imprinted in his mind. He had re-lived the moment Metatron had cut his grace out over and over trying to find a way out... Trying to find a way that he could have saved his brothers and sisters...

* * *

Thousands of miles away, Dean was also wide awake. He had gotten so used to Cas' presence that being without it was odd. Dean lay flat on his back staring at the cracked ceiling thinking about that night. He still had no idea what had happened. He didn't know where Cas was, he didn't know where all the angels were, he didn't know, he didn't know, he didn't know. The list was endless. What he _did_ know was that Cas was in trouble. He would have shown up by now if he wasn't. Dean had considered the possibility that Cas had been in Heaven when all the angels began to fall. Could Cas be human now?

This is what Dean is most afraid of. Not that Cas might be hurt, although he feared that too, but that they were headed down the road to 2014. Human Cas was one of the things to check off on the list. Could Lucifer and Michael escape the cage? Could it all begin again?

Dean still prayed to Cas at least twice a day and once at night. Cas had never shown though and this is what made Dean suspect his fall from grace.

Dean rolled over onto his side. Sam was asleep in the second bed, snoring peacefully. Dean smiled at his little brother, pleased that at least one of them could get some sleep. But after a second Dean's smile cracked and a small choked sob escaped his lips. A tear trickled down his face as Dean tried to stay quiet. He rolled over so he wasn't facing Sam and covered his face with his hands. The amount of times Dean had grabbed his phone, intending to call Cas if Cas even still had the phone, was too many to count. Each time, however, he couldn't bring himself to do it. No matter how much he needed to.

* * *

Thousands of miles apart. Both unable to fall asleep. Both needing the other. Both without the other.

"I need you." Both men whispered, in the dark of their motel rooms, alone, sad and wide awake.


	6. Feathers

It was around the time that Dean found the second black feather on the floor of the bat-cave that he started to get worried, by the time he had found the tenth he was scared, by the fifteenth, terrified and by the thirtieth, desperate.

Cas had tried to comfort him, saying there was nothing to be done. Why worry? Cas had held Dean close and reassured him that he was okay with his gradual fall. That he wasn't afraid of humanity. That he didn't mind... As long as Dean stayed with him.

And as Cas malted long, black feather after long, black feather Dean would continue going round the bat-cave, picking up each and every one. Placing the delicate feathers gently, lovingly, into a box he kept in his room. He would spend every hour attempting to think up a solution, a reason, and a way out. He checked on Cas regularly, asking if he was okay and how his wings were. Cas always lied.

Cas would watch him, sadly, wishing he could keep his feathers for Dean's sake. Running his fingers across his wings, praying that they'd stay in one piece. But now, as he ran his hands across his wings, there were barely any feathers left at all and gaping gaps had been left, where there used to be beautiful plumage. In most places he could touch the thin membrane and even the bone underneath. His wings drooped, weak. He thanked God daily that Dean could only see what fell, and not the broken casing that the feathers fell from. He would hide away, examining his wings, stretching them out to their full extent, carefully so as not to damage them further, thinking about why this was happening. He was scared. Scared for himself. Scared, no matter what he told Dean, at becoming human. Humanity was a rough area; he'd been there before, because of Metatron, and he wasn't keen to return.

Sam was also worried. His reasons, although different to that of his brother and the suffering angel, were just as important. His were more of a technical nature. He couldn't understand how Cas could be losing his wings. Angel's don't just 'lose' their wings. He poured over book after book, hour after hour, reading angel lore. Trying to find record of this happening before, he could never find anything but he never stopped trying.

And at night as Cas watched over Dean, finding it increasingly hard to stay awake all night, and as Sam tossed and turned in his bed, all three worried. Asleep or awake, they all worried; scared of what would happen the day Castiel's wings fell completely away.

**AN: So hey, two chapters in one night for ya. I hope you liked these. I wrote them before the premiere so I know that some things that are written in the previous fic have been answered and sorted out but I thought you might want to read it anyway. As always, please leave a review and if you have any requests hmu. Love you, you idjits x [what did you all think of the premiere? I LOVED IT.]**


	7. Loving You

Let me tell you what it is like to love you.

It's like pain and torture, because I know I can't have you. It's like joy and relief, because I get to see you every day. It's laughter when we talk. It's sadness when I'm away. It's comfort when I see you. It's teasing when you wink at me. It's good and it's bad. It's hearing you sing in the shower, you're actually quite good. It's my heart skipping a beat when you smile. It's hope when you say certain things or look at me a certain way. It's how I like the way you look, even if you've just woken up and you're dishevelled and your hair's a mess. It's me sitting in my room at night, thinking back through the day and grinning because of something you said. It's not being able to sleep at night because I know you are just down the hallway. It is the heart-crushing pain when you say something hurtful and it's the forgiveness after the fight. It's those eyes of yours and your clothes and your music taste and the food you eat and the movies you watch and the books you read. It's you.

Loving you hurts… But I love to love you.

Let me tell you what it's like to lose you.

It's absence. It's agonising silence. It's lonely nights spent curled up on my bed, crying. It's knowing you aren't just a few metres away in the next room. It's forgetting to eat because I was so busy thinking about you. It's staring at the wall for an hour, trying to decide whether to remember you or to try and forget. It's not wanting to forget. It's bitter hatred for you leaving me. It's self-loathing because I did this. It's trying with all my might to never forget the way your eyes lit up when you were passionate about something or how you would refuse to talk until you had had at least one coffee in the morning. It's shouting and screaming at other people even though it's you I'm angry at. It's not really being angry at you because I love you so much. It's having to get used to the idea of never seeing you again. It's considering all the ways I could see you again, but being too scared to.

Loving you hurts… But nothing compares to how I feel when I lose you.

Let me tell you what's it's like to get you back.

It's every happy memory I have ever had, combined and multiplied. It's an overwhelming joy that is hard to put into words. It's relief. It's never wanting to let you go, because I've lost you once and I don't want to again. It's getting to see you every day. It's happiness. It's singing and dancing. It's making you coffee in the morning just because I can (now you've taught me how). It's sleeping easy at night because you are just next door. It's hugging you, even when it's unnecessary. It's smiling when I hear your voice because I thought I would never hear it again. It's when every single happy feeling is connected to you. It's not being able to wipe my smile off my face. It's being teased for being so happy all the time and it's not caring because you are here. It's knowing you're alive. It's knowing you're safe. It's knowing you're here. It's everything I could ever want and it's everything I could ever need.

Loving you hurts, losing you hurts more… And getting you back is what makes everything worth it.


End file.
